Just When You Thought It Couldn't Get More Stupid

In a world filled with great and terrible challenges, there are still those in authority who are so bereft of common sense that it is a wonder they can dress themselves in order to go to work. We're drowning in a sea  of bureaucratic and government stupidity. Some days  I think my head is not only going to explode but it is a signal of the end of civilization as we know it. I thought, however, we had pretty much reached the highest level of stupidity possible and it really couldn't get any worse than it is now......

,,,....but I was wrong.


The NYC Department of Education has created an entirely new level that I wouldn't have thought possible to achieve. Watch this video while I go outside and walk around the yard a few times to try to teach myself how to breathe again.

Back in the 70's, George Carlin identified seven words you couldn't say on television. Today in this 21st Century of enlightenment, The Department of Education for NYC has come up with fifty words and phrases that are to be cleansed from their schools to protect the delicate sensitivities of the children entrusted to their care and thereby rid the world of disease, pestulance and all other manner of evil.

The complete list is at the end of the post but I will highlight a few, beyond those mentioned in the video, for you now my gentle compadres as we make our way together through this reasoned and sensitive policy.

Be not afraid for I will hold your hand and try to keep you safe and connected to reality as you read on.

Bodily Functions: We will all sleep more peacefully now knowing that the children of NYC no longer have bodily functions. They will not require the use of washroom facilities and as a result the Dept. Of Education will save millions through the elimination of the purchase of toilet paper. Children who have to 'go' will simply be reminded that they have no bodily functions and told to return to their seat.

Computers in the home (acceptable in a school or library setting): According to the DOE, there are two types of computers. No, not Macs and PCs. There are politically correct computers and those which are so dangerous, they shall not be mentioned. The politically incorrect computers are those in the home, the birthplace of all evil in this world. Mention of swimming pools at home will also be banned and thus children will be saved from having to deal with the concept of success. It also makes you wonder how they will ever get their computer 'home'work done.

Death and disease: It makes one wonder how the DOE is going to address an outbreak of a highly communicable disease in it's school system if and when it happens. 

Divorce: The DOE has determined that in this era of single parent families and marriage breakdowns, it is more beneficial to children to ignore the fact that many children unfortunately do come from broken hones than it is to help all children learn to understand and destigmatize it.

Evolution and Dinosaur: Apparently the DOE does not want its children to go into professions like paleontology which is the study of the history of the earth. But then, considering that words like slavery, terrorism and war are also banned, it won't be long before the word history itself is also banned.

Rock and Roll Music: What a wonderful celebration of nostalgia for the '50s when rock & roll was considered the Devil's music. Mention of rap music will also be banned but there is no mention of banning music by Yanni or Michael Bolton which probably should be.

Sex: I'm confused about this one. On the one hand the DOE will ban the word sex in all testing even though it  mandated sex education in its schools in 2011. It makes you wonder how they will teach a curriculum that doesn't allow for the use of the word that labels what they are teaching,

One of my favourites is:

In-depth discussions of sports that require prior knowledge: Clearly there is no room for 'knowledge' in the NYC school system and the fine folks at the DOE won't rest until it is expunged from the curriculum.

When I first stumbled on this article, I thought it was an early April Fool’s joke. It is not.

The NYC School Board is absolutely serious. They want to protect the sensitivities of children by trying to hide simple reality from them and they have decided to call this......... education.

Perhaps we should do away with the words man and woman to fix the gender inequality gap in society and, of course, outlaw the phrase ‘common sense’ so that all future decrees and decisions, no matter how stupid they may be, will be seen as great wisdom shining down on the world from the mountain top.

There is stupidity and then there is abject stupidity. This decision is beyond even abject stupidity.

While the video tries to pin this decision on the Left, the simple fact is that stupidity is not constrained by the political divide. You only have to remember that it was a Republican, who thought colonizing the moon and declaring it a state made sense, to help you remember that stupidity is a virus that doesn’t care how you vote.

I used to think that a society that worried more about how soft its toilet paper was than it did about people sleeping in its streets or abused children was in trouble and I still think that. But it is clear that when a society allows a group of people to become so devoid of even a fundamental level of common sense that it bans words like dancing for fear of offending the sensitivities of some group, it has lost its collective mind. 

Someone needs to remind the NYC Department of Education that the key word in their title is Education. They aren’t the censorship board. Their job is not to try and hide the world from children but rather teach them how to live in a world that is filled with diversity.

Better yet, I think the people of New York City should rise up as one and march to the Department of Education offices where they should drag the members of the board out into the streets, spank them in the public square and then make them write 1000 times, “I will not be stupid anymore.”

Of course, by the time the people of NYC arrive, the word stupid will probably be banned as well. After all, if banning the word homelessness can make it go away, no doubt the same people behind this decision will have no difficulty believing that banning the word stupidity will raise society’s collective IQ overnight.

The 50 Words You Can't Say In NYC Schools

Abuse (physical, sexual, emotional, or psychological), Alcohol (beer and liquor), tobacco, or drugs, Birthday celebrations (and birthdays), Bodily functions, Cancer (and other diseases), Catastrophes/disasters (tsunamis and hurricanes), Celebrities, Children dealing with serious issues, Cigarettes (and other smoking paraphernalia), Computers in the home (acceptable in a school or library setting), Crime, Death and disease, Divorce, Evolution, Expensive gifts, vacations, and prizes, Gambling involving money, Halloween, Homelessness, Homes with swimming pools, Hunting, Junk food, In-depth discussions of sports that require prior knowledge, Loss of employment, Nuclear weapons, Occult topics (i.e. fortune-telling), Parapsychology, Politics, Pornography, Poverty, Rap Music, Religion, Religious holidays and festivals (including but not limited to Christmas, Yom Kippur, and Ramadan), Rock-and-Roll music, Running away, Sex, Slavery, Terrorism, Television and video games (excessive use), Traumatic material (including material that may be particularly upsetting such as animal shelters), Vermin (rats and roaches), Violence, War and bloodshed, Weapons (guns, knives, etc.), Witchcraft, sorcery, etc.

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